Dove Letters: NEW CREATIONS

responding to the little voice within

Dear Dove,

I am writing you from week two of tour. I’m sitting here in a beautiful, bright green room right on Lake Ontario in Toronto. I’m thinking about one of my all time favorite quotes ever from the Gospel of Thomas: if you bring forth what’s inside you, what’s inside you will save you. Followed by the flip side: if you don’t bring forth what’s inside you, what’s inside you will kill you.

It’s dramatic, but it’s true.

Funny enough, the Gospel of Thomas is one of those gospels that wasn’t included in the codification of the New Testament back in the fourth century, but a copy of it was found, dug up, almost 2000 years later. In our lifetime. As if to prove the point, if you dig up hidden, what’s hidden will save you.

As much as I want to continue standing on my religious history soapbox, I will step down and talk about a song I’m going to share with you today.

I like to plan things. I like to plan when I will do things, and I imagine how it’s going to feel. I decided that after this tour I was going to dive into writing, writing the second album that is going to feel like exactly like this.

I’ve heard it said that when we make plans, the universe laughs.

I’ve also heard myself say, on record, that my favorite emotion is surprise.

So consider me surprised that right now while I'm on tour and don’t really have all that much time or energy to create, the floodgates have been opened and all I want to do is pour all of my life force into new songs.

Surprise is the antidote to control. I fucking love being in control. But surprise is God’s way of saying to me that I am actually never in control, and perhaps, when I realize this, there may actually be something for me beyond my wildest imagination. Perhaps it’s my destiny to be bewildered.

Yesterday, on an off day in Toronto, me and my best friend/bandmate/platonic soulmate Mike rented a studio to just see what would happen. What ended up happening was that it is pretty clear that at this moment there is very much inside of me that wants to be brought forth in order to save me.

This song I’m going to share, just a video of me playing it in this lakeside green room on my guitar, is one of those. I began it almost two and half years ago with another platonic soulmate of mine, Nurisa. She strummed her guitar and these words just fell out: there used to be a wall, now there’s nothing at all.

It sat in my voice memos for two years. A couple months ago I started tinkering with the lyrics. And yesterday, we recorded it.

I used to think that I wanted to save the world with my songs. Now I just kinda wanna save my own life. And whatever happens from there, is out of my control. Whatever happens from there is a surprise.

Here is: There Used To Be A Wall

Lyrics: 

I used to wanna die
Now I wanna sleep
I used to wanna fall
Now I wanna leap
I used to wanna fly
Not I’m alright to walk
I used to draw the sky
On the sidewalk chalk

There used to be a wall
Now there’s nothing at all
There used to be a wall
Now there’s nothing at all

I used to wanna sleep
Now I wanna wake up
I used to wanna dream
Now I wanna make it up
I used to wanna hate you
Now I wanna make love
I used to be afraid to change
But now I wanna shake it up

There used to be a wall
Now there’s nothing at all
There used to be a wall
Now there’s nothing at all

I used to wanna die
Now I’m okay to live
I used want it all
Now I just wanna give
I used to be someone
Now I’m happy to be yours
There used to be wall
Now I’m walking through the door

There used to be a wall
Now there’s nothing at all
There used to be a wall
Now there’s nothing at all

DOVE OF THE WEEK

This is the part of Dove Letters where I ask you, dear dove, to share what is giving you hope right now. This message of hope is our “dove of the week”. The dove is an ancient symbol of hope and peace. As I go through my life I am always looking for the doves along the way—the signs that there is still hope out there. The signs that will unlock the next part of the path. Sharing our hope is a way to keep the light alive in our world that can get so dim. If you’d like to share your “dove of the week” with me, please email hellojakewesleyrogers@gmail.com (I will always keep your share anonymous)